Last night I posted about my frustration at not accomplishing enough, of coming up short on my expectations for myself. And tonight was supposed to be my diagnosis, followed by my plan for kicking myself in the behind tomorrow night.
BUT, I got so much support, so many comments (here and on Facebook, and by e-mail) that contradicted my views – pointed out how much I actually do. I was overwhelmed, and agreed to give some thought to your views, to consider that I might not have been seeing things as they are.
The night before as I was disparaging myself, and trying to figure out how I got myself into this situation, it occurred to me that I might have “short-timer’s disease.” Now I’m not working, so I’m not getting ready to retire, but I’m getting old. I’m wondering if I’m just slowing down, giving up on the idea that I might have anything big left in me, and even if I SHOULD try to accomplish anything big at this stage of my life?
Now that I’ve had some time to reflect on how others see me, I’m thinking maybe I’m just tired right now, and truly am being too hard on myself. So rather than do a follow-up post tomorrow on how I’m going to kick myself in the booty and step up my game (as I had PLANNED to do) I am going to accept that I have to be gentle with myself, allow myself whatever time I need to rest, and then practice appreciating myself for all I do!
Thank you for your support and for showing me how badly I misinterpreted what was going on!